Worst Games to Ever be Published Thread

MissaFX · 01/21/2008, 06:44 AM

Here's a thread dedicated to games based on ideas which should have ended up in the trash bin, yet somehow ended up becomming published games.

My pick: Cyberdillo - 3DO
/startdillosn7.jpg
(The things in the background are enemies you fight...really)

I mean, what were they thinking making a FPS where you shoot plungers? Maybe at the time they had read the news story about the man raped to death with a plunger at the hands of police on the east coast of the US and they thought, "yeah a plunger, that's hard core! Lets make a crappy version of Doom!" I've heard from numerous sources that this game was supposed to be family friendly, who in their right mind though would think that a family friendly FPS would sell more than a handful of copies? The music is uninspired, feeling flat and lifeless. The levels are full of pixilated crap which looks far worse than even the 3DO version of Doom (which is by far one of the worst ports ever made) and it is impossible to at any time take this game seriously.

The best thing about Cyberdillo is the fact that it was soooo crappy, it assured a sequel would never, ever be produced. Had someone simply re-skinned Doom, the game might have then at least been fun to play and the world might have had to endure a Cyberdillo 2. Thank god it didn't.

From Mobygames:
"Yet another disco armadillo first-person shooter."

After being run over by a car, our hero Armadillo is brought back to life by an evil cyber-genetic company. He sets out to stop their evil plans in psychedelic 70's era levels when disco was king. Gather items such as bell bottoms, platform shoes, 8-track players, and lava lamps to keep your shield and funk levels up.

Rather than guns, you shoot plungers and throw princess wands at various enemies such as flying eye balls and laughing gas containers. Open doors as you move through each level (of 4 stages each) and find the specific item needed to advance to the next stage. Stop lights hang from the ceiling in certain areas and will drain your health if you pass under them when they are red. When green, you can pass them with no consequence. There are different special weapons, health (such as crickets and grass hoppers) and shield items in each level. If you run into a Relax laxative box, you will have to find a toilet in 20 seconds or you will die.

SignOfZeta · 01/21/2008, 06:54 AM

Um...Fight for Life on Jag?

Its pretty much unplayable.

There are a lot of bad games out there though.

This could be an interesting topic, but you just know some fuckwits are going to say Final Fantasy VII, and Halo and MGS2 and stuff like that.

Keranu · 01/21/2008, 06:58 AM

I must play this Cyberdillo.

Hey I never heard of that Fight for Life game (never dove into Jaguar's library), but the graphics look pretty amazing actually, I didn't think it could handle 3D so well. Seems to run a little slow in the trailer I saw on YouTube, but I'm going to take the risk of saying it looks almost as good as a Virtua Fighter game on Saturn!

OldRover · 01/21/2008, 07:45 AM

Quote from: SignOfZeta on 01/21/2008, 06:54 AMThis could be an interesting topic, but you just know some fuckwits are going to say Final Fantasy VII, and Halo and MGS2 and stuff like that.

Emphasis on the ones that are definitely boring, but certainly nowhere near the worst titles ever made.

Really hard to pick just one; I've played a lot of real crap. One of the ones that really sticks out though is Fantasia for the Genesis. How this ever cleared quality control is beyond me.

MissaFX · 01/21/2008, 07:54 AM

Quote from: OldRover on 01/21/2008, 07:45 AMOne of the ones that really sticks out though is Fantasia for the Genesis. How this ever cleared quality control is beyond me.

/117159248501ox6.gif
Umm yeah, I guess that's the story as I remember it from the movie.

/117159248600eh9.gif
Why have lives, when you can have dreams!

/117159248601iv2.gif
What ummm, I guess Mickey is ummm, no I don't understand
where this is actually supposed to be taking place.
While it looks interesting at first, it is really devoid of any detail or color

/117164321400ov9.png
Usually Disney games are filled with nice, colorful graphics from my memory.
...Why the **** did they put huge black graphics in the forground?

CrackTiger · 01/21/2008, 08:03 AM

Night Creatures!

Rescue: The Embassy Mission! (NES)

MissaFX · 01/21/2008, 08:11 AM

Quote from: guest on 01/21/2008, 08:03 AMNight Creatures!

Rescue: The Embassy Mission! (NES)

-Night Creatures-
/111507781500wc1.png
Apparently a bat is a pretty evil creature in this world. As are rats.

Rescue/Hostage: The Embassy Mission
/106692544100gm8.png
Am I the only one having Night Trap flashbacks?

Nazi NecroPhile · 01/21/2008, 11:00 AM

Bomberman: Act Zero, Night Trap, Superman 64, and Super Noah's Ark 3D. All shit and no fun.

Tatsujin · 01/21/2008, 11:44 AM

Quote from: turbofan1 on 01/21/2008, 11:06 AMNo Explanation needed.

u stealling IMAGES from PCECP.com (therefore we can't see it

)

Nazi NecroPhile · 01/21/2008, 11:48 AM

Quote from: Tatsujin on 01/21/2008, 11:44 AMu stealling IMAGES from PCECP.com (therefore we can't see it )

Indeed. No hotlinking allowed, says bt garner.

nat · 01/21/2008, 12:00 PM

Quote from: Missa on 01/21/2008, 08:11 AM
Quote from: guest on 01/21/2008, 08:03 AMNight Creatures!

Rescue: The Embassy Mission! (NES)
-Night Creatures-

Missa, you left out perhaps the most classic screenshot of all from Night Creatures.

"You have been taken by Hecate in the form of a bat."

I'm not sure such comedic genius has ever graced video games, before or since.

turbofan1 · 01/21/2008, 12:06 PM

I could give A rats ass about bt garner.Necromancer don`t you have some stand up comedy act to go perform some where`s?.

nat · 01/21/2008, 12:07 PM

Hahaha, I doubt it, but you should with that wit!

Nazi NecroPhile · 01/21/2008, 01:19 PM

Quote from: turbofan1 on 01/21/2008, 12:06 PMI could give A rats ass about bt garner.Necromancer don`t you have some stand up comedy act to go perform some where`s?.

Pure gold, ye olde deleter of posts.

GUTS · 01/21/2008, 03:35 PM

I second Superman 64, it has the added malevolence of featuring one of the most recognizable characters of all time that instantly makes little kids want to play it, just to find out the entire game consists of spending hours flying through rings and nothing else.

Also Awesome Possum is really, really bad. Besides the fucking asinine character/plot, it's super choppy with horrible collision detection which makes it nearly impossible to play.

Keranu · 01/21/2008, 05:06 PM

Quote from: Missa on 01/21/2008, 07:54 AM/117164321400ov9.png
Usually Disney games are filled with nice, colorful graphics from my memory.
...Why the **** did they put huge black graphics in the forground?

Actually Fantasia does have pretty colorful graphics throughout the game, probably the best part about the game. Those huge black graphics and other things like chains in the foreground scroll by when you play, a nice touch.

They really should've fixed up the gameplay in Fantasia though because it could've been another awesome Disney game for the Genesis

.

_Paul · 01/21/2008, 05:19 PM

Rise of the Robots on the Amiga was a travesty.

I could also mention The Great Space Race on the ZX Spectrum, but I bet very few (if any) people on this board will know that one.

guyjin · 01/21/2008, 05:23 PM

Every game on every Sinclair computer was utter trash. I feel sorry for any UKian unlucky enough to have one (which was most of them, since it was a cheap peice of trash).

JoshTurboTrollX · 01/21/2008, 06:59 PM

E.T. Atari 2600

I win

esteban · 01/21/2008, 07:06 PM

Blackhole Assault (Stop. All the jokes have been made before.) for PCE and Sega-CD is pretty friggin' lame. It qualifies as a "worst" because the game is absolutely no fun. It is not broken... but it isn't any fun.

I must admit, though, that listening to the Red Book story and music wasn't so bad. The music should have been better.

Keranu · 01/21/2008, 07:22 PM

Jack Nicklaus Turbo Golf is still the worst Turbo game in my opinion.

OldRover · 01/21/2008, 09:43 PM

Oh, I just remembered a good example...

Ultraman on the SNES. What a flaming pile of shit.

esteban · 01/21/2008, 10:47 PM

Quote from: OldRover on 01/21/2008, 09:43 PMOh, I just remembered a good example...

Ultraman on the SNES. What a flaming pile of shit.

I don't think I'm familiar with that game. I'll have to go find out about it. I'm guessing it was typical licensed trash, designed to sell simply to Ultraman fans?

guyjin · 01/21/2008, 10:59 PM

other SNES garbage:
Drakhen
Final Fantasy Mystic Quest
Revolution X
captain novolin
Spider man & X men; arcade's revenge
Rise of the Robots (but that was crap on every system it was on)

Keranu · 01/21/2008, 11:14 PM

Quote from: OldRover on 01/21/2008, 09:43 PMOh, I just remembered a good example...

Ultraman on the SNES. What a flaming pile of shit.

Haha, yeah I bought that game and have only played it like two times. I'm interested in playing it again ever since someone on another forum filled me in more on how to play the game.

TR0N · 01/21/2008, 11:33 PM

Me thinks some license games for the nes in this thread.

Nes
Friday the 13th
Jaws
Nightmare on Elm Street
Total Recall
Paperboy (Man i hated that port)
Robocop(Please the arcade version was better)

Just to name a few.

ParanoiaDragon · 01/22/2008, 02:13 AM

Cyberdillo rocks!

To the gallows with you I say, cuz I love that game, atleast, the last time I played it, I loved it! Keranu, you need to check it out, it's cool! I love the music in that game as well.

Worst game, Drop Off, Rock On, Legion, ...I'm too tired to think

Keranu · 01/22/2008, 03:06 AM

Cyberdillo looks pretty funky, I'm gonna have to get that sometime!

I don't think Drop Off is a bad game for what it is, it's just that it was released in the wrong era, making it a terrible game to publish for it's time.

MissaFX · 01/22/2008, 03:51 AM

I'm going to take a minute to pick on Drop Rock for the beloved PC-E.

/dropoffu000yc3.jpg /dropoffu002jg8.jpg
Yeah, Somebody. Would it have pained you Yeah, this guy is a deep sleeper I guess.
to just bother to tell us the villans name? Still they could have shown something.

/dropoffu003dz6.jpg /dropoffu004nf5.jpg
Oh just great, even the goodly being helping Ah, so it's that kind of RPG...
you has no idea who the villan is. With plot I better lower my blinds.
like this, it must be a long 2-D RPG, right?

/dropoffu006xt6.jpg /dropoffu007hq1.jpg
Oh do you now? I guess they felt at some point you'd stop
reading the text, so why write any more.

/dropoffu008pq2.jpg /dropoffu010ey9.jpg
Say what!? I mean what the hell could this

Are they serious? In the words of the
game be about??? Angry Videogame Nerd, "What the ass!?"

Kitsunexus · 01/22/2008, 04:31 AM

Is it bad, that after racking my brain for nearly 2 minutes, I can't really think of a game that I absolutely foaming-at-the-mouth hate?

I mean even the worst games usually have some sort of aspect I enjoy.

The only game I could probably really hate on is Legend Of Legaia, because it has WAY too many random battles, I do not exaggerate when I say every five paces a battle appears. They even put a little floating crystal above your head to make you aware of this.

However, this is based on my opinion from a Best Buy demo disc we received with some PS1 game, the real game could have possibly fixed this error.

Seriously though, I don't really hate anything that much gaming-wise. In fact, I'll start playing a game and read a review later and find out that people call it things like "total shit" and "waste of a disc".

To them I simply say ¯\(º_o)/¯ .

EDIT: And Missa, Cyberdillo is awesome for the fact that it looks like the old 3D Maze screensaver alone.

Keranu · 01/22/2008, 04:45 AM

Quote from: Kitsunexus on 01/22/2008, 04:31 AMIs it bad, that after racking my brain for nearly 2 minutes, I can't really think of a game that I absolutely foaming-at-the-mouth hate?

I mean even the worst games usually have some sort of aspect I enjoy.

Hey I agree with you. I like what CrackTiger said some time back, hate is too strong of a word, so I don't really have any games I necessarily hate. Dislike, maybe, but not really hate. It's better to love than hate anyways.

Kitsunexus · 01/22/2008, 05:06 AM

After re-reading this thread, I'll add Drahken to my list. It's not fun at all, very boring. The only thing saving it is that awesome little overworld track, I love SNES elevator music. Drahken 2: Dragonview is MUCH better.

Corporation/Cybercop for SEGA Genesis is horrible, but only because the Genesis can't handle it. I'm sure the Amiga version is MUCH better.

Accele Brid for Super Famicom is not very good, although with a bit more time in the over it would have ruled. I mean, come on, robots that turn into spaceships racing against each other against FMV backgrounds, what's not to like? It would have been the systems Wipeout, had it not been insanely hard, and had the backgrounds not been 5 second GIFS of badly pre-rendered sci-fi-scapes. The soundtrack pwns though.

Also, Super Puzzle Fighter 2 is a horrible game because it has taken away a lot of my life.

MissaFX · 01/22/2008, 07:33 AM

Quote from: KitsunexusThe only game I could probably really hate on is Legend Of Legaia, because it has WAY too many random battles, I do not exaggerate when I say every five paces a battle appears. They even put a little floating crystal above your head to make you aware of this.

However, this is based on my opinion from a Best Buy demo disc we received with some PS1 game, the real game could have possibly fixed this error.

I liked Legend of Legaia, a lot actually. It's a great RPG with one of the most interesting fighting systems ever. The fact that you can get nearly every enemy spell, including the end bosses spell makes it pretty interesting, but sometimes it can be very annoying to learn the spell you want. The number of random encounters in the mist areas is a very good thing, usually you only venture into these places to level or to gain a spell. At these times you want to fight a lot generally. It saves a lot of time walking left and right over and over and over again.

Quote from: KitsunexusAccele Brid for Super Famicom is not very good, although with a bit more time in the over it would have ruled. I mean, come on, robots that turn into spaceships racing against each other against FMV backgrounds, what's not to like? It would have been the systems Wipeout, had it not been insanely hard, and had the backgrounds not been 5 second GIFS of badly pre-rendered sci-fi-scapes. The soundtrack pwns though.

Do you know for a fact these were pre-rendered? I always thought this game was programmed similar to other fake SNES 3-D modes with all real time graphics.

Kitsunexus · 01/22/2008, 12:46 PM

Quote from: Missa on 01/22/2008, 07:33 AMDo you know for a fact these were pre-rendered? I always thought this game was programmed similar to other fake SNES 3-D modes with all real time graphics.

I'm pretty sure, them being blocky and pixelated, and going on for a infinite loop of 5 frames.

VestCunt · 01/22/2008, 06:59 PM

Robodemons on the NES sucks.

Mercs on the Sega Master System is pretty bad. I remember being impressed with reviews of the Genesis version in 1990-01, so I picked up the SMS port on a whim last year. As an Ikari Warriors clone, you'd think it would be a hard formula to fuck up. Unfortunately, the game has terrible flicker, almost no music, no two-player, shit graphics for the time and bad hit detection.

Almost all of the TurboGrafx games are redeeming in one way or another. Most of the bad ones are a least interesting. It's easy to pick on sports games, but I'd say Super Volleyball is the least appealing game on the system.

Quote from: CrackTiger on 01/21/2008, 08:03 AMRescue: The Embassy Mission! (NES)

Ouch, I'm a big fan of this game (although I did sell it years ago...)

CrackTiger · 01/22/2008, 09:43 PM

Quote from: VestCunt on 01/22/2008, 06:59 PM
Quote from: CrackTiger on 01/21/2008, 08:03 AMRescue: The Embassy Mission! (NES)
Ouch, I'm a big fan of this game (although I did sell it years ago...)

Yeah, I know of at least one other person who has an interest in this game. I don't really care about it either way, but I'll never forget renting it when it was first released and thinking: "this is the worst game I have ever played".

It came off as more of an un-game, in that there seemed to be very little gameplay/interactivity.

ParanoiaDragon · 01/22/2008, 09:44 PM

Dragonview is cool! The only thing I don't like, is the 3D, I'd love to remake that game for the Turbo, & turn the map, into a 2D top down view!

Kitsunexus · 01/22/2008, 10:07 PM

Quote from: ParanoiaDragon on 01/22/2008, 09:44 PMDragonview is cool! The only thing I don't like, is the 3D, I'd love to remake that game for the Turbo, & turn the map, into a 2D top down view!

I liked the 3D, the Turbo could pull it off.

GUTS · 01/22/2008, 10:35 PM

Dragonview actually had some really good 3D for a SNES game, but I would have liked it to have step movement instead (like Eye of the Beholder) so that they could have put some nice detail in the overworld graphics. I love the game though, it totally rules.

I forgot about Rise of the Robots on SNES, that was the worst game I had ever played up until Superman 64, which I think is slightly worse.

nat · 01/23/2008, 01:53 AM

I just got Dr. Chaos for the NES yesterday (free, luckily). I played it for about 5 minutes today before I had to turn it off. Man, that game is awful.

JoshTurboTrollX · 01/23/2008, 09:39 PM

Quote from: Kitsunexus on 01/22/2008, 10:07 PMI liked the 3D, the Turbo could pull it off.

I liked both games in the series. Drakhen was fun! It was a launch, or near launch title for SNES. It was like D&D in a video game!

Kitsunexus · 01/23/2008, 10:05 PM

Quote from: JoshTurboTrollX-16 on 01/23/2008, 09:39 PMIt was a launch

Yes. I wish I had the cart of Dragonview instead of Drahken though.

Arjak · 01/24/2008, 08:13 PM

Hoshi wo Miru Hito for the Famicom. I haven't played it, but just reading this article on it gives me the shivers...

http://hg101.classicgaming.gamespy.com/stargazer/stargazer.htm

If after reading this article you become depressed, play something totally bad ass to convince yourself that there is still good in the world.

Kitsunexus · 01/25/2008, 04:55 AM

Quote from: Missa on 01/21/2008, 06:44 AM/startdillosn7.jpg

I didn't want to mention it right off, but if you aren't looking right at the picture's text it looks like "Shoot that Funky Plunger, Dildoboy!" which, considering other titles in the 3D0 library, isn't much of a stretch.

r_benchley · 01/30/2008, 10:31 AM

I'm going to agree with everyone who has nominated Superman 64. Horrible, horrible game.

WoodyXP · 01/30/2008, 11:10 PM

Quote from: Kitsunexus on 01/25/2008, 04:55 AMI didn't want to mention it right off, but if you aren't looking right at the picture's text it looks like "Shoot that Funky Plunger, Dildoboy!" which, considering other titles in the 3D0 library, isn't much of a stretch.

Word.. I had to read that twice. I thought it said 'Dildo' as well.